Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
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