I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
