Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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