I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
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