I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
