Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
you inspire me to be a worse person
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
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