Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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