Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(586): View more from Michigan

1:57 a.m. Where did you go???

(586): View more from Michigan

1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?

(586): View more from Michigan

2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?

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(586): 1:57 a.m. Where did you go??? (586): 1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding? (586): 2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in? http://tfl.nu/vrje

Replies (33) Good night (1737) Bad night (9044)
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(608): View more from Wisconsin

They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.

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(608): They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes. http://tfl.nu/mn0w

Replies (9) Good night (3656) Bad night (971)
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(404): View more from Georgia

I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.

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(404): I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit. http://tfl.nu/bfom

Replies (5) Good night (1441) Bad night (3110)
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(620): View more from Kansas

The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".

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(620): The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices". http://tfl.nu/jiwo

Replies (23) Good night (5077) Bad night (1309)
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(919): View more from North Carolina

So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.

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(919): So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma. http://tfl.nu/it54

Replies (16) Good night (3912) Bad night (1868)
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(630): View more from Illinois

You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.

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(630): You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that. http://tfl.nu/mbpz

Replies (14) Good night (1893) Bad night (1400)
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(910): View more from North Carolina

once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.

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(910): once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits. http://tfl.nu/8psa

Replies (3) Good night (1327) Bad night (553)
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(970): View more from Colorado

Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.

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(970): Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms. http://tfl.nu/abxe

Replies (4) Good night (1070) Bad night (511)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.

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(215): I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics. http://tfl.nu/u5tf

Replies (4) Good night (1342) Bad night (622)
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(561): View more from Florida

Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.

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(561): Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences. http://tfl.nu/x85v

Replies (2) Good night (599) Bad night (1038)
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(214): View more from Texas

MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.

(214): View more from Texas

SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.

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(214): MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME. (214): SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME. http://tfl.nu/sfja

Replies (12) Good night (1227) Bad night (505)
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(314): View more from Missouri

So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.

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(314): So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body. http://tfl.nu/xsc0

Replies (3) Good night (419) Bad night (838)
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(707): View more from California

Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.

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(707): Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful. http://tfl.nu/xs64

Replies (2) Good night (536) Bad night (296)
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(479): View more from Arkansas

Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?

(1-479): View more from Arkansas

You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.

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(479): Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him? (1-479): You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring. http://tfl.nu/rmw0

Replies (1) Good night (797) Bad night (269)
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(336): View more from North Carolina

Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here

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(336): Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here http://tfl.nu/w9vv

Replies (2) Good night (421) Bad night (254)

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