Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
it was like eating out sand paper
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
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