Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Dick very happy bro
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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