I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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