i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
