Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
