Umm I'm too high to move.
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Randomize
