we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
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