too bad you live with your parents still
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Randomize
