one two three fourrrrnication!
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
