how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
