I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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