New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize
