I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
He kissed a someone with a penis
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
