i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
