If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
