Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
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