I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
