the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
