Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
