brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
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