yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Rumble strips road head = magical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
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