just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
