My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
nutella sex= disaster
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Randomize
