Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
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