The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Randomize