I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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