Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Randomize
