He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
