dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize