i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
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Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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