We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize