it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
