Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.

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  (+61): She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me. http://tfl.nu/qxca
  Replies (27) Good night (6234) Bad night (802)
• Favorite

  (573): View more from Missouri

  I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"

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  (573): I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!" http://tfl.nu/oyys
  Replies (22) Good night (5556) Bad night (1437)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  How has he not realized you're pregnant?

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Spanx.

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  (973): How has he not realized you're pregnant? (201): Spanx. http://tfl.nu/ts9v
  Replies (31) Good night (1304) Bad night (5381)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.

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  (760): new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever. http://tfl.nu/8efz
  Replies (33) Good night (716) Bad night (8157)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time

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  (515): I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time http://tfl.nu/arsj
  Replies (18) Good night (3575) Bad night (1777)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.

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  (516): This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me. http://tfl.nu/6e09
  Replies (8) Good night (3011) Bad night (808)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.

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  (570): I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end. http://tfl.nu/kio4
  Replies (21) Good night (2806) Bad night (1420)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..

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  (734): Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night.. http://tfl.nu/1tnp
  Replies (6) Good night (2849) Bad night (944)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"

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  (847): Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?" http://tfl.nu/xxms
  Replies (5) Good night (2252) Bad night (1015)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.

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  (651): You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with. http://tfl.nu/zaia
  Replies (4) Good night (1003) Bad night (1145)
• Favorite

  (765): View more from Indiana

  so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick

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  (765): so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick http://tfl.nu/orgy
  Replies (7) Good night (1050) Bad night (643)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole

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  (410): I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole http://tfl.nu/hdrj
  Replies (7) Good night (2157) Bad night (688)
• Favorite

  (928): View more from Arizona

  I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.

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  (928): I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug. http://tfl.nu/ikjc
  Replies (2) Good night (1289) Bad night (512)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.

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  (540): His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me. http://tfl.nu/adz0
  Replies (5) Good night (535) Bad night (664)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?

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  (973): He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right? http://tfl.nu/vsli
  Replies (7) Good night (388) Bad night (732)

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