I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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