i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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