I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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