I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
