Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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