I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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