Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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