just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
