You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize