Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
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