Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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